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Thursday, May 2, 2013

A LONG JOURNEY



We couldn't be happier that we are having 2 baby boys!!  It has been a long journey to get to this point but we know it will all be worth it come October.  I am at 16 weeks now (4 months along).  I would like to share at least some of our story of the journey we have been on over the last 4 years.  We were excited to start a family and felt like it was time after being married for a year.  Being pretty naive we figured that I would be pregnant in no time.  This was not the case and after trying on our own for almost year we decided to see a doctor. We did many tests and tried even more infertility treatments over the next 2 years with no success and no answers.  It was difficult to understand why this was happening to us.  We had built a healthy, happy home and were ready to add to it.

Fast forward a few years to this past August when we finally had a breakthrough.  I had a surgery that was able to tell us what was wrong with me.  After having the surgery it was determined that we would never be able to get pregnant on our own.  Meaning we would have to do invitro fertilization or adopt children.  After wondering so long why we could not get pregnant it was a relief to know why it wasn't happening.  But at the same time it was also a little disheartening to realize that we could never get pregnant naturally.  Nate and I both prayed and fasted to know what we should do and we both felt like invitro was what we wanted to try.  This decision meant that I would have to have another surgery before we could even begin the process of IVF.  The surgery was a success and we were able to continue on with IVF.

IVF is a serious process and has a very rigid schedule to follow.  I began giving myself shots in December. The first few shots were pretty difficult. If you know me, you know that I absolutely hate needles, so the thought of having to poke myself with a needle everyday was terrifying!!  Soon more medicine and more shots followed.  At one point I had to give myself 3 shots everyday.  We did a lot of prep work to get to actual process of invitro.  We headed for Utah in January where my IVF doctor was.  It was so exciting when we were actually at that point.  It was such a long time in coming.  We got to stay with our best friends: Shelbie and Tim, who were amazing hosts while in Utah.  We were in Utah for the IVF process for about 2 weeks.  We decided to implant 2 embryos hoping that at least one of them would take.  I then had to be on bedrest for 2 days; which I did at my brothers house in Kaysville. They were also great hosts and catered to me beautifully.  The next 10 days were the longest of my life.  There are no words to describe the joy that came on the day the doctor finally called to tell us if IVF was successful or not.  Best news of my life as they told me that indeed I was pregnant.  I could barely speak on the phone because the tears were flowing!!  Nate and I were overwhelmed with joy and gratefulness for the blessing that Heavenly Father had granted us.  

At 6 weeks along we had a huge scare!!  I began to have a terrible pain in my side one morning.  The pain quickly escalated to a point that I could no longer take it so we headed to the doctor.  I felt like I was in labor and I was terrified.  The doctor is an hour away and boy was it a miserable ride.  When we got there they quickly did an ultrasound.  At this time we found out that we were having twins.  I was in so much pain and overwhelmed with emotions.  They then discovered that my ovaries were overstimulated and 4x the size they normally should be.  Because of the amount of pain that I was in they concluded that they had to be twisted around themselves.  A few hours later I had an emergency surgery to untwist them.  The left one was twisted 2x around itself and completely cinched off.  The right one was only twisted once.  This condition is called an ovarian torsion and is very very rare.  It was caused from all the medicine that I had to take prior to doing IVF.  Dang Shots!!   Once I had the surgery I figured that everything would soon go back to normal and I would feel fine...little did I know.

The surgery took a serious tole on me.  Both ovaries were still very very large so I was ordered to be on bed rest because they could twist again.  After being in the hospital for 4 days I was able to come home.  Once I got home Nate's mom Leslie came to visit and she was a lifesaver   I really couldn't do anything for myself and I needed a lot of help.  After being home for a few days I began to get nautious.  I don't really know where this morning sickness phrase comes from but that is completely bogus!!  I was sick 24/7 and throwing up non-stop for the next month.  I would say it was the worst month of my life.  I was so grateful to be pregnant but boy was it rough.  Nate was the most amazing husband through it all.  He catered to my every need and I knew I had a good husband before this but I couldn't believe how he waited on me hand and foot and did everything he could to make me happy and comfortable.  I was also so grateful for the many priesthood blessings that he gave me during this time.  I ended up being on bed rest for 6 weeks until I was able to return back to school.  Now that I am 4 months the nautiousness is beginning to wear off.  I am mostly just sick at night now and I am able to keep most of the food down that I am eating.  

Wow has been a crazy road but I can honestly say that I've learned so much through the whole process.  I have learned more and more about the atonement of our Savior Jesus Christ.  I have learned to be patient and trust more in the Lord.  I have learned that we are so loved by family and friends and so many have prayed and fasted for us.  We are so grateful for the faith of others. It is very hard sometimes to understand what the Lord has in store for you but I do know that he knows Nate and I best and knows what and when we need it.  There are many many more things that we have learned through this trial that are too long to share.  We also have felt very blessed during this time in many other areas of our lives. I have loved the time that I have been able to share with just my husband but we can't wait for our baby boys to get here.  I apologize for the lengthiness of this post.  I know that we all have our own trials and struggles and there is much to be learned from them.  I hope that someone may benefit from knowing that if you are having a hard time getting pregnant you are not alone.  There is hope and miracles to be had!!
14 Weeks

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Hawks Thanksgiving

This Thanksgiving was pretty momentous for the Hawks family.  My parents were getting ready to leave for their mission in Cleveland, OH so all of the kids came home for one last hurrah.  We do not all have the chance to be together that often so it was a riot as you can all imagine.  We got to my parents on Wednesday night and the time just flew by.  We were definitely not ready to leave when the great weekend was over.  Some of the weekends event included:  Games, family picture taking, laughing, looking at ads for hours, shopping, and of course lots food.  I love Thanksgiving especially when my mom is cooking.  My favorite foods that we ate were: Nan's dressing, Sweet potato casserole, homemade rolls, pretzel salad, some amazing salad Rebecca made and Raspberry cream pie from Babe's Bakery.  I don't like potatoes and gravy or turkey but there was plenty of other foods to fill me up.  

One of my favorite parts of the weekend was the early morning shopping that I did with my sister Trish and sis-in-law Paula. We got up about 5 am and headed out into the craziness.  First stop was Big 5 and then to the mall.  We went to JCPenny (which was super crazy) but found some amazing deals, then we went to Romies, Old Navy and Sears. After that we headed to Sports Authority, Great Harvest (needed a little cookie for breakfast) and our last stop was Fred Meyer.  I was really amazed at the amount of shopping that I got done in the wee hours of the morning and great deals I got on everything.  I may just have to start doing that every year.

For some reason I have no pictures of eating Thanksgiving dinner but there are a lot of family pictures.  Hope you enjoy!!!


Love my sisters!!  Nat and Britt

Paula, Zari and Sadie

Nat with 2 cute babies

Nieces and Nephews: Zareya, Marley, Dillon, Aspen, Corbin, Z, Sadie, and Jerzy

Shandi and Corbin

Azlyn

Aspen with Jerzy and Corbin

Is this the first time you've held a baby??

Rod and Corbin
Azzy, Zari, Britt, and Corbin
Love me some Jerzy

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Wowza!! Nate is 30

 Nate turned the BIG 30 on October 4th!!  (yes this post is about 7 months in the making)  I wanted to do something special for his Birthday and although he really isn't a big fan of surprises I decided to do a surprise party anyways.  I did it a few days before his B-day to throw him off a little.  I asked a few of his friends to come up with a plan to get him to the party so they asked him to come help them hang some cabinets. We had the party at our good friends, the Duncan's, in their beautiful backyard.  Thanks for letting us use your backyard.  

Setting up the food table



Food = Better than whatever cake, rainbow chip cupcakes, and lots of candy.

Peeking over the fence.  A little too tall for the surprise.

I asked him if he was surprised?  He says he was until he pulled up and saw the balloons over the fence.




It wouldn't be a party without Nate's Nerdy Face

Here are a few of the folks that showed up to give some love to Nate!!









To the love of my life,  
       I hope that you had a great party and 30th Birthday.  You make my life fun and complete.  I love you!!

Love, Melissa